Wednesday, August 05, 2015

Waiting Room

I'm back at the heart specialist today. In the waiting room. I come here regularly enough to know that I will wait for hours to see the doctor for less than five minutes so he can tell me that that one valve in my heart that doesn't work exactly right is still working right enough to keep blood flowing.

I get a kick out of the receptionist. She is a middle-aged lady with a flat, mumbling voice. Like she doesn't care enough about this job to even open her mouth when she talks. When I come up to the counter, she always says, "I see you, have a seat." Like I should not be wasting her time by standing in front of her. But the one time I came and didn't go up to the counter, she said, with what could be considered a frown if she'd put any effort into it, "You have to come up and let me know you're here." Both times, she spoke to me like I was an idiot. But I think that's how she speaks to everyone. 

Except for one person.

She got a phone call a few minutes ago, answered it the way that she always does, and then squealed, literally squealed like a thirteen year old girl. She opened her mouth, the way that normal people do when they talk, and shrieked, "OH!! Hello! It is so good to hear your voice, sweetheart!...Of course I miss you...mmhm...the sun isn't shining here either, Boo." 

But the sun is, in fact, shining here. So I can only assume that this was meant to be some kind of lovey metaphor.

When she hung up the phone, her mouth pressed back into a straight line and she went back to talking like her lips were sewn shut.

I have been here for almost two hours.

1 comment:

Steven Cain said...

I get to do that too, for much the same reason, but less often. Kind of scary. But hey, I want to tell you something. I mean, if I can. I've been a follower, or whatever, long enough that I think I can ... We don't 'talk' much any more, but I haven't talked to many people much in a long time ... anyway ... I had this dream about you ... well, not you specifically, don't get creeped out. The dream was about a book that you wrote and illustrated. It was so absolutely swell. I didn't read it really, but I looked at the pictures. They were awesome. But what was super cool about it is that the book was kind of folded like an accordion ... you could turn the pages, like a regular book, but they were attached at the front, like a birthday card ... backwards. The pictures were one thing that way, but then you could unfold the book, too, and then it was one long picture ... a slightly different, fuller picture or scene. And best of all you drew the whole thing with one line from beginning to end. The only thing is that there was a dragon in it and you have never struck me as a dragon person :/

I thought about just drawing it and writing it myself, I mean, I did dream it and all, but still, it kind of feels like stealing ... so ... I told you ... just in case.

Hope your heart is perfect as it can be.